Need Control

In January 2007, I reached my goal weight. I had to lose 58 pounds to get there. But, I did it. And, from that time until (around) April of 2013, I was able to maintain that number of (around) 174 pounds.

What happened? Starting in Feburary 2013, I began working from home 100% of the time. Being that close to the kitchen all the time was not a good situation. By the end of 2013, I was about 15 pounds over that goal weight which I had maintained for 6+ years. In the 3 years since 2013, I have added another 10 pounds or so (give or take depending on the snapshot in time).

Basically, the last 4 years have been a slide downhill which has erased 40% of the weight loss that I worked so hard to achieve and maintain for over six years.

Age has something to do with it. I turn 54 this month which means I was 50 when the trip downhill started. (I was 44 when I lost the 58 pounds and kept it off for 6 years and change.) Stress plays a hand as well. The past 2 years have been perhaps the most stressful years of my life. I wouldn’t exactly call my house a comfort zone these days. It started 2 years ago with my wife’s tragic situation and got worse when I was laid off from my job 5 months ago.

For an emotional eater, that’s a bad combination – stress filled home environment and being so close to the kitchen all day long.

At this point, I just want to lose 20 pounds and try and maintain it. The number doesn’t have to be 174. I can live with 178 as long as it stays there. I feel like I can do it. I know I’ve tried many times over the last 4 years to make it happen.

What’s different this time? At this point in my life, I feel like the ability to control my weight is the only thing I have going for me. And, I need to get some control over anything at this point.

This entry was posted in Aging, Dealing With Challenges, Failure, Fears, Goals, Hanging With It, Honesty, Maintaining Weight, Mindless Eating, The Scale, Using Your Mind, Venting. Bookmark the permalink.

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